I used to run...

    Two years ago I was an anti runner. Mostly due to the trendiness of the sport around here. Everyone I knew was bit by the running bug and it was the talk of the town. I didn't really like to run or didn't really try, so I would talk a little shit and play off my hidden jealousy. I wanted to be part of the club. Finally my best friend talked me into walk\jogging with her and I finally began to understand the appeal of running. My hub loved to run, along with his dad so they signed me up for my first half marathon to motivate me. My best friend signed up too and we started training. I was able to run farther and farther with each run. It was great, it cleared my head better than any other workout ever had. We had went from non runners to finishing 13.1 miles in less than a year. It was awesome and I was very proud. Not only for finishing the race but for the weight I had lost while doing it. So we took a little time off to recoup and then signed up for another 13.1 the following year. We didn't train as hard for this one but had been doing cardio training at the gym. I was able to run way further than I ever had before and shaved 10 minutes off my first years time. This one was rainy and hard and I got a little emotional at the finish, but again I did it, and that's the point. I planned on taking a few weeks off again to recover, but life sometimes gets in the way and a few weeks turned into 8 months.
   That leaves me here, a non runner again, feeling a little jealous and no longer part of the club. I want to be, but I feel like i'm just full of "i used to" and "when i ran" stories. I think it might be one of the most difficult things I have let myself do, relapsing on laziness. All that progress I had made and then I just let it slip away. It's so much harder now to get myself out there. I want to start running with a group of women from my gym but I guess i'm a little intimidated. I did a few 2 milers alone last week and they went okay, slow but okay. I'm back to a beginners pace. Run a minute, walk a minute, cramp a little,  pant a little. I know I can get back to where I was before. It's just going to be some serious hard work, and maybe even a little courage.